How Much of Life can we ACTUALLY Control?

Here’s what I know for sure, Happiness Is A Choice.

In the past, my life was overwhelming.
It was full of sadness,
financial struggles,
relationship betrayals,
and even, the death of a child.

While I was walking down that particular path in my life,

I literally could not see the forest for the trees.

I was unaware of the reality that there was so much more that I was capable of.

BUT… through mindset and beliefs, I slowly began to discover that inside of myself there lived a power that was capable of designing my life in any way I decided I wanted it to look.

I had a creative force that was lying dormant inside of me that could paint the picture of my life in much the same way that I paint murals.








I first needed to decide on the style of picture.

Then narrow it down to a specific idea,

and then use my paintbrush to bring it to life.


The difficulty in accessing this creative power that lies within is that the hustle of life is filled with people, events, and stimuli, there’s no avoiding it.

The weather.


People we encounter in our day.

societies ideas about life and how we should react and feel in any given situation.

The trick in accessing this power is to acknowledge that the stimuli  we encounter throughout the day is neither




They are NEUTRAL,

AND… often cannot be controlled.

Everyday, we are presented with hundreds of situations.

Yesterday, my teenage daughter presented me with a situation that was difficult for me to hear and accept.

I had a choice in that moment with her to either get angry and REJECT her ideas and cause her pain…


Listen to her side of the story and use this moment as a teaching opportunity.

I chose to teach her about life.

I chose NOT to crush her fragile spirit with my hurt feelings,


Rather be her parent and guide her through adolescence gently and carefully so that she to will learn how to create HAPPINESS in her very own life.

That is what makes life beautiful, our ability to CHOOSE our reactions. 

Sure they are usually going to be based on our beliefs.

BUT that doesn’t change the fact that, we have total self-power to choose how to





to the stimuli in our lives.

We control our responses.

We control our happiness.

We can choose happy,




just as easily as

we can choose






 So here is a simple way to show you what I believe this creative power consists of.

Stimulus → ( the event)

Belief → (your thoughts about the event)

Response. (your feelings and actions)



Allow me to illustrate with an example:


My father has had a few strokes that has completely changed his life. He can no longer walk or work like he has always done in the past. He is now dependent on us for his care.
(There actually is nothing is good or bad about the stimulus, it’s neutral)


My belief surrounding my dads present condition is that he is doing the best he can at any given moment.

 I love him for the amazing man he has always been,


I cannot control the past or future.

 I am what I think, and I choose to ooze love and acceptance to help my dad know that I am honored to care for him during this period in his life.


I love my dad in the present moment and choose to celebrate him right where he’s at.

I choose a respectful, peaceful, authentic attitude when he needs my help.

I choose to love first and take action second.

I choose happy.

Does my Belief and Response mean I stop advocating, researching and finding ways to make his life more comfortable?

Not a chance!

I do everything in my power daily to assist him to thrive in his new and often frustrating world so that he can be as happy and comfortable as he can be.

I have discovered that when I Follow the Stimulus→Belief→Response method

I am reminded almost constantly that:

I am in full control of my happiness and the design I choose for each and every single day of my life.

Nobody else controls my beliefs.

I choose my thoughts, actions and responses, and thus, choose happiness.


With a clear and precise mindset,
Combined with a conscious commitment to my core beliefs,
I have discovered that it is really as simple for me to shift my life from a life filled with clutterchaos and overwhelm

to a place of peace, calm and happy,

as it is for me to completely transform a room with paint.

This I know for sure,


I would love to hear your thoughts..please share.

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