FEAR is your friend…NO- really it is!

I write a lot about FEAR in my posts.

I am constantly encouraging you to overcome it.
Trust it.
Learn from it.
But I have never written a post that was dedicated entirely to the subject of FEAR.
I want to do that today because… Fear is not your enemy. Fear is your friend.

True peace came to me in my life when I finally understood that I was strong enough to handle anything life choose to throw at me.

Overcoming Fear became a whole lot easier when I discovered my Faith, and developed a relationship with my Savior.

In fact, one of the things I am the most grateful for in my life is the fact that at the age of 43, I can honestly say that I am ready to face life’s challenges head on because I have discovered so many beautiful truths about fear, and today I will share a few of them with you.

1st truth: Embrace Fear.

When you can learn to welcome it and push past it you can finally find your true destiny waiting for you on the other side.

Life will begin to OPEN up for you.

The things that once held you back will no longer have any power over you.


2nd truth: All growth springs forth from venturing out into the unknown.

Out there beyond those fateful frontiers of the limits you have placed on yourself lives your greatness.

The infinite possibilities available to you in life lie waiting for you in uncharted territory.

You simply have to choose to embark upon that voyage.


3rd Truth: To get everything you want in life, you must be willing to do something you have never done and be someone you have never been.

Where you are in your life right now is a result of the choices you have made in the past.

And you will continue getting what you have gotten unless you do something bold.

Something new.

Whether it be scuba diving,

Writing a book,

Running a marathon

Or asking a friend for a date…

I want you to go out there and do something that makes those butterflies in your stomach go wild.

This action does not need to directly relate to your life goals.

I have found that the action itself  is just kind of like a metaphor for my limitless potential.

Every inch I have decided to step out into the unknown has built a more rock solid, unbreakable spirit inside of me that cannot and will not be shattered.


4th Truth: Self confidence results from successfully having survived a risk.


Thus the form of the risk matters less than the actual level of courage it requires to face it.

The greater the required amount of courage, The greater the rewards on the other side.

As C.S. Lewis said, “Courage is not simply one of the virtues, but the form of every virtue at the testing point.”

5th Truth: Any worthy risk will induce fear.









It is only natural.
Expect it, so you don’t let it stop you.

Then embrace your only freedom:

The only true freedom we can ever experience as humans can be found inside the space that lies between any stimulus you might encounter in life…and your response to it.

By choosing to focus on the pleasure that is waiting for you on the other side of fear, you shut down the influence of the “possibility of pain”  that is standing right next to you before you take that leap of faith.

That single choice is the spark of courage.


6th Truth: It takes courage in the face of fear, to take a leap into something magnificent.

Each step through fear pushes your comfort zone out one inch further.

This constant process of mental, physical, spiritual and physical growth transforms success from uncertainty to inevitability.

As a result of the compound effect of those incremental steps over time, you will achieve a level of self confidence that will make you unstoppable in the face of any challenge that comes your way.

7th Truth: The only enemy you have is your choice to be paralyzed by fear.

Should you remain stagnant though, you will continue floating down a lazy river that leads to nowhere. And that is definitely once choice you are free to make in life.



If, on the other hand,

You DO choose to live your greatness,

You will most likely find yourself right smack dab in the middle of the raging rapids of life,


you will hit rocks.

You may get hurt…

Rest assured, as long as you aim for the stars, life will beat you down.

You will encounter failure.

I don’t say this to discourage you from trying…quite the opposite actually!

When you face your fears and overcome them, the unbreakable spirit that will emerge after being completely tested and forged in the fires of facing fear will guide you through every obstacle that life will throw at you, and propel you into your divine purpose.

8th Truth: Today, at this moment, you get to choose your destiny by taking that first step.


Custom Painted Halloween T-Shirt

I had a request from the PTO president at my school to paint her a T-Shirt for the Halloween carnival at our school.

She had a very specific design in mind so we got together and

I drew a picture, she approved the picture, and then I got busy painting.


Here are the pictures of the finished T-Shirt.

t shirt






Here is the design drawn onto the T-Shirt.

(I hope you can see it.)

If not the next picture will bring the design out for you.



t shirt 1








So as you can now see… she wanted a Bat Girl design. 🙂


t shirt 2








Now I have the painting all done and the glitter applied. Now all that is left is to glue on the rhinestones to really make it SPARKLE…


t shirt 3










Here is the finished T-Shirt.



Haunted House Decoration made out of cardboard

I was asked to make another haunted house out of cardboard. But this time the client requested a more traditional, whimsical house. SO here are the step by step photos of the second 5′ tall cardboard haunted house this year.


haunted house







Here is the house all cut out and ready to start painting and adding the details.


haunted house 1







I started by spray painting it a navy blue color.



haunted house 2










Next step was to start cutting small pieces of cardboard and creating window frames and shutters. I will also cut hundreds of small pieces for the tiles on the roof tops.




haunted house 3







Here is the house with all the windows framed in and the tiles on the roof tops.




haunted house 4








I took some twine string and made a spider web and hung a spider from the web.



haunted house 5








Here is a close up look of the tiles. I deliberately cut them in very random sizes and attached them in a haphazard fashion to create the illusion of age.

I also added some old creepy purple fabric to all the windows for tattered curtains. I also added “Googlie eyes” to each window in the house.




haunted house 6








And here is the finished house.



I hope is the focal point that were hoping it would be.


Happy Halloween!



Follow your INTUITION and let it escort you,

Sometimes life is hard…


It can still be filled with joy and happiness!

I love that line from the famous Harry Potter movies. There is such Wisdom in Dumbledore’s statement to Harry.

As you recall in the movie, Harry was doubting his abilities to defeat his enemies when his mentor spoke these words to him.

It is in our darkest moments that we need to remember that WE alone are the sole creator of the reality that we experience each and every day.

You may not always get what you think you want.

But trust me, when you grow older and look back on your life, you will see that you got what you needed.

You will look back and see how the pieces of your life seem to almost magically slip together in an awe-inspiring manner.

While we all strive to find happiness, we must also accept that there is a natural ebb and flow to it.

We will experience hard times.

Those trials allow us to experience more profound joy.

We cannot have one without the other!

So my advice to you today is this:

Sink deeply into bliss and use sorrow to enhance your appreciation of all joys.

To fully appreciate the happiness in our lives, we must teach ourselves to open up to it.

I always tell my kids that I can be having the BEST day, and still feel upset over some broken pipe that needs fixed at the school.

I want them to know that you can be happy no matter what outside situation you are dealing with.

Happiness is a choice that you must make OVER and OVER all day long!

We must learn to cherish the moments as we live them.

Happiness is all around us but we must train our brains to see what it is we seek.

It can be found in the cloud formations that you take the time to stop and appreciate.

It can be found in the hug from your beloved.

It can be found in your very own heart, just choose to SEE it, and it will appear everywhere.

You have total control over how you do this.


Should you ever find yourself in a state of ,
you can find comfort knowing that the mere state of desperation has the power to open you up to new solutions.
When you have exhausted all resources and feel you have nowhere else to go…
 will ALWAYS gift you with the opportunity to surrender to new ideas,
new emotions,
new actions,
and change out of nothing other than necessity.

Without desperation, the hand of change would seldom take ours to lead us somewhere new.

This glorious life you have been gifted is completely yours to design.

Life is full of choices but they all belong to you.

You must accept full responsibility for your life and understand that only when you are absolutely true to your heart’s desire, can you access your power source fully.

You came here to fulfill a purpose, if you do not know what that is yet, let your emotions guide you.

They are well in tune with your thoughts, even the ones buried deep within you that may never have been spoken out loud.

Follow your intuition and let it escort you, because it knows what your purpose is.

It is pushing you gently towards authenticity and bliss but you need to pay attention.


Accept responsibility for your thoughts and your mindsets – the good ones and the bad ones.

Accept responsibility for your emotions and listen carefully to what they tell you about your life as you live it.

Accept responsibility for your actions and do your best to align your thoughts,

Your emotions,

and your actions

From the HEAD DOWN and the HEART OUT.

Remember, it is never too late to adjust your sails and change direction.


When you come across fear…
And you will.
Pay attention to its message-

Then remember that when fear is paired with some type of positive action,

You can create confidence in the void that once held nothing but uncertainty and anxiety about what might be next.

Be brave.

Be Bold.

You have one life —

What are you going to do with it?

We Can’t Give a GIFT We are UN-willing to Accept Ourselves.

I was listening to the radio the other day as I drove down the highway with my sweet husband.

The lyrics to a song said, ” I want to learn to live with no regrets.”

That hit me in a very powerful way.

I turned to Jeff and said, “That is EXACTLY what I would wish for if I had one wish I could make.”

Then he said something pretty profound to me.

He said, “But Mel, the regrets are what have shaped you into the woman I fell in love with. They taught you what things you DIDN’T want in life and pushed you to find new and better ways to live. Your regrets are your greatest teacher, why would you want to get rid of such a great gift?”

You know what?

He was completely right.

If I had never felt regret and remorse over the choices I had made that had led me to the painful circumstances in my life, I would never have had the will power to change anything.

So today I want to talk about living our life from a place of love and acceptance

over who we were.

Who we are now,

And who we will eventually become.

As I sat and reflected on my life this morning I realized that I regret not so much the choices that I make, but the choices that I don’t have the courage to make.

I am not unhappy with the things that I’ve done, as much as I mourn for all the things I haven’t done.

Image result for I wish I had tried that

I no longer fret over the “mistakes” made, because now I see them more as magnificent life lessons.

Inside each and ever one of my mistakes lies the potential for either regret, or growth and development, and I alone decide which one will bear fruit in my life.


As a young woman, I wanted to be the center of attention.

But as I have gotten older I’ve learned to allow myself to become, more and more, the witness and the witnessed, the seer and the seen, the observer and the observed.

I enjoy sitting back and letting others have the spotlight.

I have found the spotlight can be exhausting, and there is rest in the shadows where I can sit quietly and just watch.

And I’ve learned to do this with a minimum of judgment.

(Although not with no judgment, for there was tremendous judgment in simply learning to observe without judgment.)

If I had to leave one sentiment with the world upon my death it would be this:

What matters is that we learn to love others,

to give,



and interact with others in a way that allows them to experience this love.

You know when you have arrived at this place of love because your life itself is a testament to Christ.

You now know that you can do this even when argument or conflict arises and the setting doesn’t appear, on the surface, to be the most conducive to expressing love.

True love is a state of being.

We were all born with the light of Christ inside of us, although we may not always be conscious of it.

I’ve learned not to focus on the results, but rather on the process.

I have found that when I  focus on specific results,

such as the money as a result of a job,

OR a specific outcome from a project I have created,

The most I will ever attain is that on which my human, conscious, limited, educated mind can focus.

I lose the joy of creating when I worry about results.

When I worry about how many “views” my blog has gotten for example, I lose the joy of writing the post.

Yet when I am able to focus instead on the process, that part of creating something worthwhile…

that makes my hearts sing,

And the results – those which I’ve dreamed of and those I didn’t even know I could create – manifest most exquisitely as if out of thin air.


I’ve learned that we tend to make our choices either from fear or from love.

We can’t give a gift we are unwilling to accept ourselves.

We cannot stand in fear protecting ourselves and then hope that we can magically move from that fear based thinking into love and have the ability to offer the world the gift of our unique talents.

We cannot demand that our need for control be met by everyone and then simultaneously say that we support freedom and choices, and offer love.

Surrender is the greatest gift you can give yourself and the people you love.

It is the freedom that comes from letting go of the need for control and allowing yourself to exist in the elegant simplicity of being the seer and the seen, the witness and the witnessed, the observer and the observed.



You are VALUEABLE in every sense of the WORD!

Today I want to share a gift with you.







That gift is the gift of:

Wisdom, when it is shared is a gift from the past that be used to improve the future.



When used as a foundation, it can serve to improve the experiences of those who you are sharing it with.


We all have stories that make us smile, and others that we prefer to forget.

We have all experienced personal and professional ups and downs in our lives.
We all have those stories that if we could,  we would completely erase from our lives.

But rather than erase them, why not cherish them for the nuggets of wisdom that they contain.

Do not regret the past.

As hard as that may be, it is behind you and can no longer threaten or hurt you aside from the power that you, yourself give to it.

The past is behind you with nothing but knowledge in its wake.

And as we learned from the wise Rafiki:

You cannot change your past, so why not transform it into an educational tool to bless the lives of the people you interact with on a daily basis?


Do not be disappointed or discouraged about today.


Today is temporary and tomorrow is on its way.

Tough times are palatable and surmountable when you look at life this way.

Immediately following Victor’s suicide, I was broken and lost.

Life was exhausting.

Just getting out of bed some days hurt more than I could have ever imagined.

I would force myself to get up and get showered and then tell God, “Ok Lord, the rest is up to you because I can’t do this anymore.”

He miraculously got me through those dark days, by teaching me how to live my life one second at a time.

Then as I got stronger, I was able to face life minute by minute, then hour by hour, and eventually I began to see hope again.

Now nine years later, I have not only re-discovered my HOPE, I have learned how to REALLY live life again.

I am happy.

I can trust.

I can love.

I have healed!


I hope that you will not ever feel alone in any obstacle or experience you are facing.

You are NEVER alone, for many have struggled in similar ways and their stories abound.

I have met so many beautiful souls through my BLOG.

They have lived through similar experiences as I have.

They have generously shared their experiences with me. Together we have given each other Hope.  We have shared our life, and our wisdom and through that sharing we have gotten stronger together.

So seek out the stories of those who have traveled on a similar road as you have.

Look at it this way, success and failure all have the same byproduct:


Wisdom is a gift gained from the past that serves as a foundation for our future,


If you are willing to share with others, you are assisting them on their journey through life as well.

Share your stores and pay forward your experiences and wisdom.

Hearing stories of perseverance gives people hope.

Such stories tell people that they are not alone in their experiences and that they will ultimately prevail.

You are valuable in every sense of the word.

What you have already accomplished is amazing and should not be kept to yourself.

Share your successes and failures with your circle of influence.

By sharing, you show the courage it took to survive.

Allow your past to create hope instead of hopelessness.

Be a survivor, not a victim, and in this was your past will become a beautiful light to the world instead of a shadow that you are running from.

I am going to share with you one of my favorite quotes of all time. This simple little quote has carried me through some of the roughest waters of my life.

It was my lifeboat, and so today I am going to share it with you and pray that it can become a life boat for another person who might need it today!


Draw that line in the sand today, and decide to be an inspiration!

Share the wisdom you have acquired through your experiences.

You never know who might need to hear the words you speak.

Have a great weekend. I will talk to you again on Monday.