How to Discover Your Hidden Assets

My life has been a series of unfortunate events for sure…

But to leave it at that would be such a tragedy because my life has ALSO been a series of Divine Miracles.

 

So which one am I going to focus on?

Which part of my story is the most interesting,

the most amazing, and will garner the most attention?

For me…I am going to choose to focus on the miracles.

It seems that no matter what tragedy has fallen in my lap, (if I am honest)…I would also have to point out the fact that at the exact same time that the tragedy was unfolding, so were the miracles that would somehow carry me through the tragedy.

For example…

When I found out that I was pregnant with my fourth child, I was  upset.

Pregnancy for me is a difficult situation where I am sick 24/7 for the entire 9 months, among several other complications that I experience.

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But little did I know at the time that this child would end up being the very thing that saved my life when Victor killed himself.

She was only 8 months old when he died, and she NEEDED me to take care of her.

She gave my life purpose and meaning when I was at a point where I was struggling to see the meaning in anything.

I think life is like that for everyone if they are being honest.

Everyone experiences difficulties, heartache and drama but the truth of who you are is never found in the loss, the sadness or the pain that being a human being brings.

The real truth of who you are is a beauty as constant as the northern star.

We are loved and cared for by a compassionate God who will never abandon us.

If God is absent from your life, you need to acknowledge that it was you who turned your back on Him, not Him who left you.

All you need to do is ask for His forgiveness and invite Him back into your heart.

 

If you remember nothing else then, never forget that beyond the troubles of this world there is another place where you can choose the part of you that is always loving and true, and totally in touch with the knowledge that we are all one and that a part of us always was and always will be perfect.

Because that is who you are to God. Our Savior gave us a priceless gift on the cross, and He wants nothing more than to have you use that gift.

Isaiah 1:18

“Come now, let us settle the matter,” says the LORD. “Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool.

 

Another big thing that I have found is that I should never be afraid to ask tough questions.

So often I have found the answers were in my heart all along.

It is by asking questions that you will soon come to realize how freedom and choice are always yours.

The problems we encounter can be vast, varied and many, but the solutions are always found in joining with that special place in your heart where the truth of who you are is found.

Believe that in the heartache this world sometimes brings, there is an opportunity to discover and grow the self you were meant to be.

Believe that you can be anything you truly want and know that you are not alone in a journey that is sometimes fearful and difficult.

The constant companion of your heart is the true you that is always there as you discover the strength you can be.

Learn to use this invaluable resource.

Proverbs 2:10

For wisdom will enter your heart, and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul.

Know that the strength of your heart, can offer blessings beyond your imagination to your world.

Choose with total acceptance the fearless you,

The complete you.

And the you than can shine to a world that longs for truth, integrity and love.

As you remember who you really are, you will also remember that by asking the question, believing in the answer and choosing a way forward, you now become the song of life itself.

Take this message and remember the beauty in that special place which is within each and every one of us;

a limitless resource,

a problem solver,

a hope for the future

and a gentle light reminding us that we are not alone.

the-light-within

 

 

 

 

 

 

So for today, be wise just in the moment and know the vast and unlimited resource that is available to you, that is not dependent on anything for the simple reason that it comes from from you.

The true you.

And the true self.

In a world that deserves to see exactly who you are and what you can contribute, enhancing life itself.

Be fair to your self.

Be true to your self.

And be you to your self.

Love has come to light the way.

When you get in touch with that part of yourself that is untouchable,

That is the beauty of your own creation,

That is beyond the world…

Then you find the strength, the solution and the realization that within that perfection all answers are awaiting discovery.

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Happy Pills and other life lessons…

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I was talking to an acquaintance today.

He asked me if I was happy in my new home and marriage.

I told him that YES, I was extremely happy.

In fact, I informed him that it feels like I have just won the LOVE LOTTERY!

 “You seem happy,” he observed. 

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This encounter got me thinking about the difference in peoples attitudes.

What leads one person to a positive outlook on life, and another to a negative one?

Even two people from the same family, living in the same town, with the same friends, can have two very different attitudes.

Why is that?

Is there some kind of special routine that promotes happiness?

Maybe it is the food they eat?

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I know when I can feel myself begin to feel run down and tired, I will take a vitamin B-12 to help restore balance to my body

Could it be something as simple as that. Could a vitamin be the answer to this riddle?

I think we all know that the answer to that question is NO, but what I do believe is this…

Happiness is something to be nourished, paid attention to and cultivated.

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I have several people in my life who seem almost DETERMINED to be UN-Happy.

They love to complain about every little thing in life that does not go their way.

They are convinced that the world owes them something.

Nothing is ever their fault. When there is a problem, they always look to someone else for the reason. They never seem to look at their own contribution to the problem.

They live their life confined inside a prison cell of their own making, where they are controlled by the need to be a victim.

I know there have been studies that show some people are born with happier dispositions than others.

BUT…

There are also many studies that suggest there are things we can do to promote happiness.

And that my friends is the BEST news in the whole wide world.

I’ve been thinking of a way that I could compress this idea into a capsule form, like my vitamin B-12,

and this is what I have come up with…

As I am a lover of words and try hard to live a spirit-centered life, I have composed a list of  12 words that begin with the letter “B” which I have found very helpful to my own sense of happiness.

I offer them in hopes they inspire a few Vitamins (promoters of vitality) of your own.

 #1:BELONGING:

A sense of belonging is so important to happiness, and is something we need to cultivate through building strong ties with our family, friends, community, workplace, world at large.

#2: BELOVED:

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   Beloved is a name for the divine spacious presence we carry in our hearts and whose eternal and infinite presence holds us in His heart too.

  Beloved is a word for home. 

Beloved is also a name for our lovers, our children. 

Beloved is a word that cherishes relationships and an intimate sense of belonging.    

#3 & #4: BEAUTY, BRILLIANCE:

These B’s are simple. You only need to learn to turn the eye, the heart and the mind to look for and perceive the sacredness of the world. 

There is beauty and sacred perfection everywhere you look. 

#5:BLISS:

This is the unique path that is yours- the gift or talent that is yours to give to the world.  Those who are in touch with their gift, and who have learned to follow their bliss, are among all who can call themselves happy. 

#6: BIRTH:

This is not only a word that marks the beginning of our life.

It is also a word for creativity- for channeling the energy of Life through you and into the world.

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#7: BELIEVE:

As happiness is often a result of our thoughts and the stories we tell ourselves, what we believe shapes our perspective of reality.  I’ve learned that I have beliefs that uplift me…

and those that limit me. 

I’ve learned to question my assumptions, then how to keep the good ones, and let the negative ones go. 

#8: BOUNTY:

To perceive bounty, plenty, abundance, and to live your life from love as opposed to scarcity is a definite happiness booster.  

Never allow yourself to forget the laws of nature…Good begets Good and Bad begets Bad.

#9: BLESSINGS: 

Happy people count their blessings. 

They have learned the power of gratitude. 

And they have also learned the power of blessing. 

If there is something that you can not count as a blessing, bless it and ask for God to help you heal the issue. 

#10: BREATH:

A simple practice I use to invoke happiness is to breathe in goodness on an inhale, and breathe out pain on an exhale. 

When I focus my attention on inhaling goodness, and ridding myself of pain on the exhale, I have found that my attitude immediately improves.

We are blessed with over ten thousand breaths a day.  Imagine how much goodness you can inhale! 🙂

  

#11: BOUNDLESSNESS:

We are all blessed to live in a world that is bigger than we can even comprehend. What a wonderful word to have on our list.

 #12: BEGIN:

Begin is a word that says don’t let your fearful mind talk you out of pursuing your passions and living your dreams. 

Happy people know how to begin and, when necessary, begin again.

Whatever you can do or dream you can, BEGIN it.

So there you have my Vitamin B-12 Word list.

We now have a vitamin that can recharge our bodies. 

And…

A a list of 12 powerful B Words that can recharge our mind.

Remember:

Top 12 Life Lessons I learned from my Dad.

Tuesday was my fathers 72nd birthday. That event has caused me to pause and reflect on all of the life lessons he has imparted to me. The fond memories I have of the times we have spent together, and most of all the love he has so freely given me all my life.

me and the folks

 

 

 

 

 

I am his baby girl.

We have seven kids in my family. Five of them are boys, so my sister and I had a very special and tender place in my dad’s heart.

I am right in the middle of all seven kids. So I have a very interesting personality. If you know anything about how birth order influences a person, you will know that as a middle child,

I am a peacemaker.

I am a negotiator.

I am resourceful.

BUT…

I am also the BABY girl.

So I also have several qualities that the youngest child would possess.

I love the spotlight.

I am always trying to entertain.

I can be slightly self-centered at times.

But despite all of that…

My dad has always loved and encouraged me to chase my dreams.

I am, and always will be the daughter of one of the greatest men to ever live.

So today, I want to share with you some of the wisdom that my dad has shared with me over the years.

#1: The most important things in life actually ARE free.

What I mean by that is this:

As long as I never forget that my spiritual life comes before my material life, I will be okay.

Spirituality is not something you can purchase, but its worth defies description.

If you can develop a spiritual connection with your creator, life becomes a whole lot easier.

By learning to leave my sins, my fears, and my longings at the foot of the cross, I have been able to free up so much space in my mind for other more worthy things, that my life just naturally became more expansive and beautiful.

And that wisdom was something that didn’t cost me a single dollar…
Just years of trial and error.

 

#2:  I should never judge a man for the color of his skin, his faith, the car he drives, or the clothes he wears.

A persons worth goes so much deeper that the things we see on the surface. He taught me to dig deeper and really get to know a person before I make a decision about their character.

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#3: Every person alive desires to be seen and heard. So close your mouth and open your ears!

I had lunch a while back with a friend that I had not seen in years. When we sat down, I just looked at her and told her how much I had missed her. Then I simply asked her to catch me up on what has been happening in her life.

She called me a few days later to tell me that she has never had such an enjoyable time in her life. She thanked me for listening to her “yammer” on for over an hour.

That really drove home to me, just how lonely most people are, and what a priceless gift attention is.

#4: When you speak to someone, always do it looking them straight in the eyes.

Usually when it is hard to look someone in the eye, it is because you are feeling some type of insecurity.

My dad likes to say, “Never let them know your scared. Be courageous, and proud enough to look a man in the eye when your having a conversation.”

#5: I have learned that fear is just a state of mind, and nothing else.

 

(This one wasn’t straight from my dad, but he set a wonderful example for this truth, and by his example I was able to discover it for myself. That is why it is on the list today.)

 

#6:That I should be aware of how I see the world, because the world will be exactly as I see it.

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#7: That a problem is not a problem, just an opportunity to learn the lesson and become wiser, stronger, and more well adjusted to life.

This next piece of wisdom is HUGE!!!

So stop and really let this next one sink in deeply.

#8: Everything in life is borrowed, only my dreams and my life belongs to me.

 When the day comes for me to leave this beautiful planet called Earth, the only things I will be able to take with me are the memories of the things and dreams I achieved.

And the only things I will be able to leave are the good or bad things I did to make of this world a better or worse place.

My dad is a wonderful person who has touched the lives of many people.  When He leaves this world, he will have left it a much better place than when he arrived.

There is a song that reminds me of the kind of man my dad is.

That song is: “DO SOMETHING” By Matthew West

Here is a link to the song.

Enjoy the music, then take the wisdom from the song along with my dad’s advice and go out there and DO SOMETHING with all your heart!

#9: Nobody owns the whole truth.

As a human being I am unfortunately, condemned to make mistakes: but knowing that I am not perfect will keep me humble.

I don’t need to lament my errors, just learn from them because when I do that successfully, my mistakes magically become lessons instead.

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#10:That the most valuable thing I can ever hope to receive in life is the joy that comes from giving love to others, without asking anything in return.

Part of making that happen is the understanding that I should learn to respect others for what they are, not for what I would like them to be.

 

#11: That turning my life into a song of joy is a responsibility: life doesn’t owe me anything.

 

That the past as well as tomorrow are just dreams in my own mind,

So I must 

 

A wise person knows that watching a shooting star and asking for a wish will keep alive the child that will always dwell inside of them, no mater how young or old they may be.

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Sit in the grass and watch the clouds float by and see how many different pictures you can find in them.

By doing these small things my life will remain a song of joy.

 

 

#12: The only person I should compete with is with myself.

That finding the true purpose of my life is the most important mission of my life.

There is nothing more important for me to discover during my lifetime than who I am, and what God’s purpose for me is.

I hope that after reading this post today, you are a little bit wiser.

A little more kind.

And ready to get out there and DO SOMETHING!

 

 

 

 

There are things that can NEVER be taken…

Today I want to introduce you to someone that I admire.

Someone that I look up to.

Someone that is special and deserves recognition…

YES YOU!

You are infinitely free,

resoundingly magnificent,

undeterred by fear,

overflowing as love itself.

 

Isn’t it amazing to think that this way of being is available to you right now in this very moment.

That you are a person who is worthy of recognition…

How differently would you live your life if you honestly believed that…

You could finally be  be free of the problems that define you.

And that it is possible for you to live in peace, ease, and contentment with things as they are.

But none of these things are even remotely possible unless you are willing and ready to be fully conscious and connected with your life.

Consider these life lessons, and put them into practice.

If you will do these few things as often as possible, I promise you that you can’t help but live the fullest expression of your natural, shining, inherently lovely self.

#1: Orient your whole life toward what you love.

If your life is a statement of your interests and how you spend your time, then are you aware of how you spend your minutes?

Do you spend them feeding confusion and frustration?

Do you let unsatisfying habits run unchecked and waste your precious moments?

There isn’t any magic to being happy and fulfilled.

It’s simple—

consciously orient your whole life toward what you love.

Find the fire in you for what you really want, and follow it.

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I want you to begin to understand just how much it actually matters what thoughts engage your attention.

There is power in how you choose to act.

Do you understand the power that the things that you allow into your mind by the things you read and watch, who you associate with, have over your life?.

You need to Get clear about what you most desire.

Let it completely infuse your body and mind and guide your actions.

You may be surprised to discover how simple it is to be happy and peaceful.

 

#2: Be willing to question everything. Then to see what is actually true for you.

Don’t allow beliefs, expectations, and judgments to mask your magnificence.

They will attempt to paint the world as scary and make you think you are a fraction of your true potential if you let them.

Take every treasured belief, every sad and fearful story that you recycle in your mind, and question it.

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Get in the habit of asking these few questions often:

Are you sure that it’s true?

Does it define who you really are?

Or is it a constructed thought form that has nothing to do with your true beauty?

Don’t get caught in the trap of defining yourself as limited, insufficient, or incapable, because it’s not true.

 

If you believe that the world is a dissatisfying, troublesome place. Challenge that Belief!

See things as they actually are, not through the veil of your distorted thoughts and painful experiences.

Then watch your angst melt away.

#3: Don’t be a victim.

 

 

You are not a victim of your circumstances, your past, or what other people say or do—

UNLESS you can choose to be.

Things happen, but how they affect you, is totally up to you.

Don’t define yourself by your past or by the feedback you get from others.

Don’t wait for the happiness you long for, begin today to FIGHT for it!

Shed the identities that don’t support you, and live your natural brilliance, right now.

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#4: Live in the Yes!

There is an undercurrent of unity, harmony, and love that underlies all things.

It is real, practical, and completely available to you when you are present with faith and hope.

Understand this one simple truth:

 when you resist, you suffer.

If you are attached to hopes, desires, and expectations, that is the same as if you are saying “no” to life.

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Deeply accept things as they are as if you had chosen them.

Once you can master that in your mind, Conflict and confusion will end,

and that is when you will finally meet the person I wanted to recognize today.

Alive,

Awake,

And fully available to this precious life.

 

 

Life REALLY is a Beautiful but sometimes painful Journey

Today, as I hugged my sweet husband goodbye, and he held me in his arms and promised to see my later tonight, I felt overwhelmed with such a sense of contentment and joy.

After he left,  I went back to getting myself ready for work.

And as I did I began to reflect on my life and how I had arrived here, at this moment, married to such a kind and loving man.

Living a life where I finally feel safe, loved and protected in so many beautiful ways.

Those of you who know me, and have been in my life for any part of the past 25 years, can attest to the fact that my life has been a series of bad decisions that have led to some pretty painful consequences.

So it is especially profound for me to be where I am in life right now.

I want to bear witness to all of you that “I”, Melanie, did not get myself to this place in life.

As I sat and reflected on my life this morning, I realized this beautiful truth…

The only thing I did that I can take credit for was surrendering my life and my future to the Lord.

The truth of that statement cannot be understated either.

My decision to surrender my life to his will for me was the ONE decision I have made over the past 25 years that was finally a good one!

The plans He had for me were far more beautiful than I could have ever created or imagined by myself…

That is how I KNOW that I am where I am because of the Lord, and not because of anything I did myself.

So imagine how strongly I FELT the words of this song that started playing on the radio as I drove to work today…

I felt like the Lord was speaking directly to my heart through this song.

It was “Through ALL of It” by Colton Dixon

Here is a link to the song on Youtube.

Stop reading right now and listen to this powerful song.

How many of you could relate to that song?

As I look back over my life I can see so clearly all the times that I was being held up and supported by the Lord.

I can see all the times when I honestly believed he had abandoned me because I was losing everything that I thought I needed to be happy.

Then, how those things I thought I needed were replaced with things HE KNEW I needed, but couldn’t give me while I was still holding so tightly to those people and things that were actually destroying any chance of happiness I may have had.

25 years ago, I graduated from High School. I set out on my journey in the world FULL of hopes and dreams.

Very few of those dreams I had back then were ever realized.

Does that make me sad?

Sometimes!

But mostly, I feel such reverence for the miraculous ways the Lord took my bad decisions and used them for my growth. He so perfectly turned my mistakes into miracles and helped me create a beautiful life that I really love.

A life that is so deeply satisfying that it defies description.

I know that I will still make mistakes along the way.

I know that there will be times of such deep sorrow that I won’t know if I can carry on for one more day…

But I also KNOW that through it all, He will be right there beside me, helping me and guiding me to the life that He designed for me to live.

By learning to surrender the future to Him, I have discovered the secret to a life of freedom and bliss.

One of my favorite parts of the Bible to read is the book of Romans.

I have been humbled and transformed by the message Paul teaches in this book. This scripture in particular seem very relevant to me today.

Romans 12:1-2

1 Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship.2 Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

 

 

I would be so honored if you would share your own story of surrender with me.

By sharing our testimonies, we uplift and bless each other.

It is my deepest hope and prayer that this blog is a blessing to those who read and support me. I know that you are all a blessing to me. I have met and become friends with some pretty amazing people on Word Press.

Today, I want to thank you for your kindness and support.

God Bless you all.

I want to end today with one of my favorite Dr. Seuss quotes.

 

Faux Wood In Livingroom

Our livingroom has these amazing floor to ceiling windows. They are such a fun feature in our home so I wanted to add some really fun character to them that would make them look more like the kind of windows you would find in an old Spanish Style home.

So I faux painted a mahogony wood grain around them to give them the appearance of old wood beams.

I also carried the wood beams over to the small pony wall going down to our basement to give our home the comfortable feel that only wood can create.

Here are the pictures…

livingroom window wood grain base coat

 

 

 

In this picture, I have base coated the area in a light yellow paint to give the wood the yellow undertones it needs. Then I took a small paint brush with black paint and made the beginnings of the wood grain and knots.

livingroom window glazed

 

 

 

 

In this picture, I have added two layers of “GEL GLAZE” to them. I used golden oak, and mahogony glaze to add the next layer to the wood.

Our living room windows now look like they have been framed in with big mahogony beams. This instantly gave our home the feel of an Old Spanish Style house.

But to complete the feel I needed to carry the beams over to the staircase.

So here are the pictures of the pony wall.

pony wall before

 

 

 

 

 

 

Here it is, white and uninteresting…

But wait till you see it all finished.

pony wall finished

 

 

 

 

 

Let me know what you think about the changes to our home in the comment section below.

 

 

Display Case For Jeff

This is a display case that I made for Jeff. He had the top of the case and the drawers already, but I just knew that with a little extra work, I could create a display case for his rock collection that would house his treasures in a unique way.

Again, I made this case with the Spanish style of our home in mind.

Here are the before and after pictures.

display case top before

 

 

 

So this is the top piece that Jeff already had his rocks in.

I sanded the shine off of the finish to make it look a lot older and added an arrow and drawer pull to it.

display case drawer before

 

 

 

Here is the plain particle board drawers that Jeff also already had. I painted them to match the weathered tourquoise wood that is scattered throughout our home and added some fun drawer pulls that I painted to look like aged silver.

display case after

 

 

 

 

 

 

Then I mounted the entire thing on a base made out of 2×4’s. I built the base that would hold the top of the case so that it was the same size as the drawers. Then we added small sections of legs to add even more character to the entire piece.

display case next to pictures

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Here it is, all set up next to the Pueblo images that I painted earlier for our new home.

Now Jeff can proudly show off his extensive rock collection.

He has rocks from all over the world displayed inside this case.

 

 

Latest pictures of the NEw House Remodel

This is my laundry room cupboards.

When we bought the house everything had a fresh coat of white paint on it. I have nothing against white paint, but I wanted a little bit more personality for our new home.

Here are the cupboards BEFORE

laundry cupboards before

 

 

 

 

 

See they look pretty nice as they are, but I had a vision for the beauties they COULD be.

So I started by lightly adding medium broun brush strokes to them that would mimick wood grain.

Here is what they looked like after the brown paint was added.

laundry cupboards 2nd step

 

 

 

 

 

 

They look quite different already, but Jeff and I are decorating our new house with a distinct Spanish flair, so I still have one more step to accomplish the look I am dreaming of.

The next step was to dry brush a small amount of turquoise paint over the top of the brown to give them the look of old wood that had lost most of it’s original color.

Then I found some really fun handles for the doors.

Here are the finished Doors.

laundry cupboards finished

 

 

 

 

 

 

Why the Wise Man Build Upon The Rock…

Yesterday I took my 14 yr daughter to the eye doctor to get her new contact lenses.

She has terrible vision and cannot see anything without her glasses.

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She is getting older now and wants to get rid of her glasses.

I agreed with her that she was old enough to handle the responsibility of contacts.

She was excited all day, but her excitement quickly turned to regret.

At the Doctors office, it took her over 30 minutes to successfully put the contact into her eye.

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Then it took her another several minutes to successfully take it back out again.

She was ready to cry before we even left the doctors office…

But to make matters worse, when we got home, the contact was bothering her eye, so she took it out to rinse it off, and dropped it. We tried UNSUCCESSFULLY to locate the contact.

At this point she burst into tears and said that she regretted ever wanting contacts, but that she really like the fact that she could see so much better with them.

She was torn between her traumatic experience and the clear vision the contacts had provided.

I held her in my arms and told her that we would talk about it tomorrow after she had some time to calm down and get her emotions back into focus.

About this time, her brand new step-dad came home from work. 

She was unsure how he was going to react to her losing a $45.00 contact lens.

He hugged her too, and told her that there is not one single person on the planet who wears contacts who hasn’t lost at least one.

Her mood immediately began to improve once she realized that neither one of us were mad at her.

She came upstairs and had dinner with the family and even began to relax and laugh with the rest of us.

This whole experience made me start to think about the states of our minds.

What makes one person healthy and resilient, and another prone to depression and addictions?

I have been told several times that I have an extremely resilient personality. 

So I began to ponder where my resilience came from.

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I was born into a very loving and supportive family. So from the time I was a newborn infant, I have been loved and protected.

Even when life seemed determined to destroy me, my family was always there behind me, loving and supporting me, telling me I was going to be OK.

My best friend as a child was my maternal grandmother. She was everything to me. I think a lot of my strength comes from her too.

grandma tippets

 

 

 

 

But what about people in general?

What is it exactly that separates the strong from the weak?

I honestly believe the roots of either mode come directly from our experiences in childhood.

Children form a trusting outlook of the world if their experience has been that people are generally caring, that the key people in their lives are attuned, and that they themselves are worthy of love.

Children who grew up in a home like I did, seem to just naturally form their core beliefs from a secure base.

 

This allows them to view life and relationships from a more positive outlook where they can then create a more calm and confident personality.

A calm and confident personality has the ability to somehow melt away the negative emotions that come after a traumatic event just like the sun can melt away the clouds.

I am not suggesting that the only people who are secure and healthy are the ones who had a perfect childhood, because a perfect childhood doesn’t exist…

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I am merely suggesting that a stable beginning in life seems to give a person the extra ability to connect with the more healthy states and remain open-hearted during a trauma,

Still, there seems to be no “MAGIC BUTTON”

 

that I know of,

 

No surefire way,

To create some everlasting “COMFORT ZONE”.

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There is no way to deny the harsh realities that many people face each and every day. (I, myself have lived a very painful and harsh life for the past 25 yrs.)

Some realities are extremely hard to bear.

Some pain NEEDS to be expressed, and calls out for loving support and care.

We each have our unique timing and ways of dealing with life’s hardships; 

Grieving and loss have their very own natural rhythms.

The path through suffering is not always so clear. But we each need to find our own way in the face of our challenges and difficult situations that we will eventually face, and to learn how to care for ourselves, and others in whatever ways are needed.

So I guess, the thing that I believe makes one person resilient, and other prone to depression is the sense of security that allows us to feel protected and safe in the world regardless of the circumstances we may find ourselves in.

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So is there a way to create a sense of security, if we have previously not had one?

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I believe that ANYONE can learn to live their life from a secure foundation.

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For me, that foundation is my faith in the Lord. I know that no matter who, or what may stand against me, I have God standing behind me. Keeping me safe and protected.

By finding a secure foundation upon which you can build your life, just like the wise man who built his house upon the rock, is one way I honestly believe that anyone can begin to create a base in positivity which can easy their suffering.

I am NOT suggesting that it is possible to keep suffering at bay.

Suffering is a part of life, and can be a great learning tool for growth.

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But, I do feel strongly that a secure foundation will allow you to keep negative forces from becoming destructive when they do come.

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” There is a crack in everything”  

sings Leonard Cohen,

“That’s how the light gets in.”

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The Dalai Lama teaches about depression and says,

“To prime the secure mode in hard times, we need to create helpful inner circumstances,” these are capacities one can cultivate, such as adaptability,

calmness,

equanimity,

loving kindness,

or insight,

to mention a few.”

Those are all good places anyone can start from to begin right now creating a more secure foundation in their lives.

For my precious daughter, she just needed to know that her struggle with the new contact lenses was normal. That she was not in trouble for making a mistake, and that she was so much more important to Jeff and I than the small amount of money that the lose lens cost.

Once she knew for herself that she was still worthy of love, and that her struggle was normal, she was able to regain her composure and find joy in her day again.

I would love to hear your thoughts about today’s subject.

How have you been successful in creating a secure base in your life?