We all start out feeling this way, but all to often this feeling doesn’t last.
Life kicks in.
We start to see their flaws…
the magical feeling is gone just as fast as it arrived.
Did you know that the reason most relationships end is
NOT because something major has happened, such as an affair?
The real reason that those loving feeling seem to disappear just as quickly as they arrive is because of…
Little BUT extremely destructive everyday moments.
Since this is the Month we celebrate …
I thought it would be really fun to talk about the many lessons I have learned in my over 40 yrs of life on this planet about
I have seen love from many different angles.
As a child I was raised in a home where I was very loved, and protected.
I felt safe and sure of the fact that I was loved dearly.
As a young woman of 18, I married my first husband, and was educated in the many ways that love can hurt and destroy life.
Then when I was 25 I had my first child, and was exposed to unconditional love for the first time.
Then again at the age of 28, I found myself falling in love with the man that would become my second husband.
He was Prince Charming during our entire courtship… but once we were married he became a cruel troll.
But as his wife, I gave birth to three more babies and learned more about love than I ever thought possible.
And for the past eight years, I have lived my life as a single mother of four.
I have dated several men in those years.
Some became friends.
Some have disappeared into the unknown, only to live on in my memories…
But fate was on my side, and over a year ago, I was reunited with a classmate from high school. Jeff!
Jeff has undoubtedly been one of my greatest teachers so far…
Second only to my children.
So today, I am going to share some of the lessons that I have learned about romantic love.
What if I told you that I think I may have accidentally stumbled upon a powerful balm that can actually heal your relationship and help you get over upsets – any time you needed it?
What if this medicine could instantly help both of you recapture the magic and intensity of your early days together – that precious time when you were both falling in love?
Better yet, what if you didn’t have to pay a penny for this cure-all?
Wouldn’t you want this thing as soon as possible?
Well, here’s the best part:
you have this miracle pill right now.
In fact, we all have unlimited, uninterrupted access to it.
Every couple does.
Sadly, most of us go through our entire lives without ever realizing we had the cure within us all along!
So what is this miracle cure?
Your Magic Moments!
Think about it…
Every couple has a laundry list of magical moments where they felt especially connected to each other.
In fact, as you just read that notebook list, I bet you were reminded of a memory with your beloved.
These Magical Moments are the emotional, physical, mental, and spiritual places where everything between you both feels natural and easy:
- Maybe you met each other in a serendipitous way, and you feel that your relationship is “meant to be.”
- Maybe on your first date, you discovered that you both like your fries with fry sauce instead of ketchup.
- Or perhaps you both share a love of hunting Indian Writings on the desert walls.
- It could be the morning you got rained out of your picnic plans and instead had lunch inside the truck and talked for hours.
These little moments of connection –
rather than big, dramatic ones –
are the ones that build up to a couple’s falling in love.
That’s why I call these moments “A Magical Cure”.
These are the moments where time stands still.
Moments where there’s no other place they’d rather be.
And definitely no other person they’d like to be with.
But heres where it gets complicated…
In the heat of conflict or disagreement, these moments are quickly forgotten.
When emotions are fired up about the issue at hand, it’s all too easy to lose perspective.
Suddenly, you are swamped with negative feelings about each other, and you can’t see the forest for the trees.
The trees represent the conflict at hand, but you lose sight of the lush forest you’ve built your relationship on.
I have learned how to use these Magical Memories to teach me how to let life happen, and still remain in love with Jeff.
This is the one thing that Jeff has really taught me.
He knows where our special places are, and he will intentionally head for them whenever conflict arises.
And yes, conflict happens for even the most in-love couples!
Jeff somehow just seems to know when I am overloaded with my responsibilities.
That is when he will just step in and help me get the work done, then he makes me sit and just “BE”
He knows that conflict is an inevitable part of any intimate relationship, but that working through conflict as a team will strengthen our bond.
He knows how important it is to keep the good feelings alive.
That is why you can never stop trying to create these Magical Moments together.
Because making time together a priority and scheduling activities you both enjoy gives you something to look forward to together besides the “dull-drums” of life.
In order to keep things fresh and exciting in any relationship, you both have to be committed to your own personal growth.
Another powerful tool is to develop your own interests.
Then you will be able to share your discoveries with your beloved,
This exchange of ideas is a powerful way to retain the excitement of the “discovery phase” that characterized your initial courtship.
Tap Into Your Own Relationship Medicine Daily!
This has been a real eye opener for me in my journey through the many phases of love in my lifetime.
One of the most romantic moments happend with me and Jeff after a long ride on his 4-wheeler.
I snuggled up to his back and just wrapped my arms around him.
He asked if I was tired.
I said, ” NOPE, I’m just in heaven right now. This has been one of the best days of my life!”
We remind each other of that moment often, because, that moment, when time stood still…
was THE moment I KNEW that I was in love with Jeff.
I know that tapping into the power of your “Magical Moments” will dramatically sweeten your relationship, too.